“Youre sick of hangin around and you’d like to travel;
Get tired of travelin and you want to settle down.
I guess they can’t revoke your soul for tryin,
Get out of the door and light out and look all around.
Sometimes the lights all shinin on me…
Other times I can barely see…
Lately it occurs to me what a long, strange trip it’s been.
– Grateful Dead
Boy, what an emotional roller coaster ride it has been aboard Mystic Lady! One minute, I am loving life aboard our new home, while the other half of me is worrying about the small stuff, like where is all the dirty laundry going to go? It seems that Cloud 9 is quickly vanishing, but I refuse to give up already. Life is too short to be anything but happy!
This morning, I woke up stressing about everything possible at this point in time. I am worried about graduating college in two months. I am wondering how in the world I will ever pay back my loans. I am worried I will never be able to condense my personal belongings, and years of memories into this tiny little boat. I am worried the dogs won’t adjust to the cruising lifestyle (although they are doing better than me transitioning at this point). Overall, I know that I am fearing the unknown and that is what makes me most anxious. I need to remember to breathe, and listen to my mom’s advice: “Nothing worth having comes easy”.
I am almost 22 years old and I have realized that I spent my entire life wanting to grow up. Now that I am “grown up”, I don’t know how to handle it and I just want to be a kid again. While I know that is irrational thinking, I understand that life is what I make it. The times I feel that perhaps this sailing life is not for me, I know that in the back of my mind this is exactly what I need. Sailing is equally a physical and mental task, and without either, s*i* can hit the fan very quickly! These are the reasons I am choosing to continue on this journey into the unknown. Wish me luck!
ANY ADVICE WILL HELP!